​​​​​​Because humor is funnier when you know it's true.

How to be an unsuccessful humor writer (continued)

How unsuccessful are you?

I am so unsuccessful that I regularly get rejected by “McSweeney’s” and “The New Yorker.” That’s being rejected by the best!

Do you have a writing schedule or regimen?

Yes, I do.

What is it, jerk? Oh yeah, sorry! I awaken at 6:00 A.M., brush my teeth if it's Thursday, then head down to the kitchen to resuscitate yesterday's coffee. I check my e-mail, put on MSNBC to see what outrages Trump has committed overnight, then go back to bed. When I get up again, I write a bunch of stuff if I'm not too nauseous.

Do you ever struggle with Writers' Block?

Gee, I can’t think of a thing to write about that. Yeah, coming up dry here. Sorry.

Can you guarantee I too will be an unsuccessful humor writer?

Definitely! To be a success in the humor writing business you have to have talent, drive, desire, and determination. If you had any of these qualities, you'd be doing something constructive instead.

Thus, your successful unsuccess is assured!

I look forward to not reading you in “The New Yorker.”

-Perry Block

Perry is a Baby Boomer who frequently tries to pass as a millennial, although his references to Kukla, Fran, & Ollie and circles under his eyes which extend onto the face of the next person sometimes tend to give him away.

You can follow Perry on Facebook, Twitter, and on his blog Perry Block - Nouveau Old, Formerly Cute.

Perry has just published his first book also named Perry Block - Nouveau Old, Formerly Cute which chronicles Baby Boomer life in the modern era plus parody, satire, and anything else you want.  He respectfully requests you put your life on hold while waiting for the second.