​​​​Because humor is funnier when you know it's true.

Just a day on the links

​I got up very early to walk our white Bischon.  While outside she managed to step in tar (which I did not notice) and to pick up some Arizona critters (which I also did not notice).  Came back to new house and noticed tarry dog prints on new carpet.  Chased dog, found her chewing herself bloody to get rid of critters.  Found (expensive) emergency vet on line, got dog de-tarred and on heavy meds to deter self-chewing.  De-tarred carpet while enthusiastically urged on by spouse. 

Out of nowhere comes a golf ball that explodes our bay window into a million slivers all over tile, carpet, furniture and us. On the phone with insurance company – which had just closed for the day so we rolled over to the support line and after much polite conversation (cursing and yelling) they admitted we did have a policy that covered such incidents.  They gave us a number to call to have the window removed and covered and the glass shards cleaned up.

Shared the evening with the clean-up guys .  Did a good job except for no window. Window guys are coming today – yay! Went to bed very late – a little gun shy of errant golf balls.  How the guy hit our house is a miracle of really bad golf.  The people from whom we bought the home said they’d only been hit 3 times in 10 years.  But I am thinking of firing back at any golfer who hits into my yard from now on.

- Anonymous